Real Stories From Hurricane Katrina

While reading about the tragedy unfolding along the country's gulf coast, one of Swirleypine's editors ran accross a story on an entertainment newsite that will go unnamed. It is presented here as another release from the Unassociated Press, very slightly edited to exaggerate the silliness of its content:

The Unassociated Press
9/1/05 5:17 PM

Hurricane Katrina's assault on the Big Easy is having repercussions in Hollywood.

The aftermath of the devastating storm that authorities fear left thousands dead, flooded more than 80 percent of downtown New Orleans, and ravaged the Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama basins, has caused several productions in the region to shut down.

Two Disney films were forced to evacuate New Orleans before the hurricane made landfall: Déjà Vu, starring Denzel Washington, and The Guardian, with Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher. The Los Angeles Times reports that the studio hired a charter jet Saturday and flew 70 crew members out of the city and back to Los Angeles before the monster storm slammed into the Gulf coast. Kevin and Ashton are reported to be resting comfortably in their Hollywood Hills and Malibu homes, respectively.

Another film pulling up stakes was Warner Bros.' horror thriller The Reaping, which stars Hilary Swank as a myth debunker investigating signs of the 10 plagues. Little did the two-time Oscar winner know she was about to encounter a natural disaster of biblical proportions.

A studio rep said the cast and crew for the Joel Silver-produced film caught a flight from Baton Rouge to the relative safety of Houston, Texas. Ms. Swank and the crew are reported to be finding relief with other refugees in the Huston Astrodome, and are holed up in the luxury box of the owner of the Huston Texans. While Katrina wreaked havoc on the production schedule, filmmakers are ready to return to Baton Rouge and resume shooting next week--that is, if the basic infrastructure, power, car rentals, clean roads, capuccino production, etc., is back up and running.

"We're anticipating resuming production Tuesday, after the Labor Day holiday. The crew is expected to return to the Baton Rouge location tomorrow," said Warners publicist Stacy Ivers.

Earlier reports that the hurricane washed out some sets there, causing minor damage, were unconfirmed.

Warners and Disney aren't the only one placing a call to their insurance company. The producers of The Last Time, a comedy-drama costarring Michael Keaton and Brendan Fraser, suspended production immediately once mandatory evacuation orders were issued Sunday by New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin.

"While the production has incurred some extra expense as a result of the delay caused by the continuing executive order preventing us from reentering New Orleans, more importantly, we are happy that our cast and crew are safe," says a statement from producer Adam Rosenfelt, president of Element Films, the company overseeing production. Rosenfelt says he hopes to start filming again as soon as possible.